Only the Brave Look Inside

What are you running from and do you have any real hope
Of out running it 

why not be brave stand tall and slay the murky inner demons that congregate in your foolish thoughts at night 

Haven't you heard the glistening sword of clarity is the greatest gift you can give to oneself 

so weld it high like a double edged long sword and cut down the approaching enemy of negative emotion that persist in your head

In the deep recesses of your mind they are begging to be released set free and laid to rest in a bloody grave 

Once restored set out on a quest of any magnitude for however long it takes you be the judge but make sure to gather up a handful of friends that glisten brighter than rare freshly cut gem stones 

Also be careful not to drink to much in the depths of your sorrows only partake of rich wine to heighten your natural inclination toward ecstasy 

Have no fear when travelling over distant lands were danger often lurches hidden in the garb of poverty 

Laugh at the blandness of existence while cherishing the exotic vision of nature 

But always remember the only place that truly matters is inside you

Blurry Bittersweet Memories and Rude People

Some people are so predictable. They think they no more than everyone else and have this whole life thing figured out. They're the passive aggressive type in a good secure job with a painful personality unable to attract anyone's of quaility. They pretend to be your friends when secretly they hate you and want to be living a life far different to their own. Like lepers they lament their drudgerous lot in life while at the same time they feign love for their many painful pursuits.

At a party I recently attended, there was such a horrendous description. I had never meet them in my life and they didn't bother for a second to introduce themselves. In a mad high voice they proceeded to talk to the people I was sitting and chatting with offering meaningless chit chat and unwanted lip service. Sometimes I wonder who raises such bratish human beings so devoid of manners and politeness. Sure we all have our faults but should always make the effort to be courtesy and do right by others as much as we can. Depending on how you treat others sooner or later the circles you move in will either be more enticing or stale depending on your character traits. One when was ready should do their best to shed off as many trivial boring and insufferable aquantancies and old high school friends. One shouldn't waste to much time energy or tears filling up the dead empty containers of persons with your own limited supply of empathy and love ❤️ Family should always take precedent over friends in my opinion too.

Well since this post is already a bit of a moan I'd also like to address something that has been heavy like a thousand gold talents weighin on my mind. This problem actually caused me a great deal of discomfort and triggered off residual pain like a terrible wound. My mother recently bumped into the Father of someone I use to hold very dear to my heart, in a way I still do, but nothing like the affections I once shared for this person. Although I had no interest in knowing about this person I found out they were working in government and had a string of partners and failed love relationships since we parted. In a way this saddened me deeply, as an extremely emotional person I felt rather melancholy.  I already knew this person had moved on and didn't begrudge them as I had too though still suffering from bloody heartbreak. When I found out the news about this person it was as if a vital piece of my heart had slowly died or stopped working, unable to pump oxygenated blood around my body causing a temporary depression. After mulling this over for a couple of days I slowly recovered and rejoined the present world and stopped being dragged into my past universe inhabitated with unimaginable conflicts, malicious spirits and frenzied poltergeist.

Once I had fully recovered and obtained command over my freewheeling and vivid mind I became stoically glad to have felt the pain that was first given to me early on in life. As a young child I had always been different and suffered from low moods and dreadful pain unknown by most for whatever reason I shall never know. However through my reflections on this person who more than a deeply uncaring person was a wounded child I knew in my heart that we were simply incompatiable. I being a caring loving person who is naturally supportive and kind-hearted should avoid being with someone  who is hellbent on destroy any happiness that walks toward them on wilting and ugly knees. My self-esteem reduced to a negligent entity was an unexceptable cause of such a poorly matched union. No instead I was made for much grander things and to be loved equally if not more than as much as I could give to a happy and loving partner. I thought to myself; "In the end it must be so that selfishness begets gross unhappiness. Pain brings forth everlasting joy and past love must remain forever locked away and abandoned in the past, left to die in solitude under the trees of love sprawled out across rolling hills in blurry bittersweet memories".

A Death in my Circle I lost my kind hearted friend Katie Oh

wow sad day throwing some dirt on my friends coffin not even 30 years old and they've past on. Makes you think about all the things you take for granted. While also fighting the want to turn the clock back and try to help them cause you never knew how much they needed you. Feeling melancholy cause you know the happy days and memories shared with that same person living and breathing less than a week ago are limited to the past tense. Your heart kind of cracks a little because you'll never be able to tell that person how much you loved them. It's so awful when you've treated someone like a family member but instead of them letting you help them they push you away and in the process they lose their personal battle with their demons and succumb all alone and die. You don't really get a second chance to save a life and you can't help but feel they had so much more to offer the world. My friend dying has me stronger and even more focused to chase my dreams, work hard and push on enjoying all the beautiful moments and things in life in their memory. Even if you would've wanted more than anything to have shared your journey in this world with them a little longer. Good bye for now Katie

Lana Del Rey's - Melancholy new single "Honeymoon" - sultry, sexy, but no smile post Wedding :)

Lana del rey our favourite dark side popstar/beauty queen has been trending on the Billboard social media charts after leaking her new song "Honeymoon" to the masses. After I stopped trawling the internet news for a second I gave the single I listen this is what I thought!

Instantly I hear influences of Sinatra again but in a more modern sounding context than "Ultraviolence" nostalgia ladened production. There is also certainly a sultry, sexy character to
Del Rey's singing performance with over course an underlining melancholic sadness.
It's hard to really get a wrangle on the song as we all know Lana is undeniable marriage material
and you would think of her jetting off the Bahamas post wedding hopefully happy, but thats not the case as this song is most certainly about her inevitably falling into a bad, destructive relationship.

If your expecting a home run smash hit like 'Summertime Sadness' your paddling the wrong canoe on this one folks but if you feel like the world has kind of let you down even when you should be super happy this could be the song for you :)

Vocals and harmonies are blindingly good